Life as a celebration

“ I believe that imagination is stronger than knowledge -- myth is more potent than history -- dreams are more powerful than facts -- hope always triumphs over experience -- laughter is the cure for grief -- love is stronger than death.”

- Robert Fulghum

A few days from now, all roads will lead to memorial parks and cemeteries in observance of All Saint’s Day and All Soul’s Day. My family is still grieving over the passing away of two women : my aunt and my mother in –law. Perhaps, we will never get over grieving the death of our parents as we fondly remember them every now and then. Anyway, the first two days of November are the structured times to do our remembering of our dearly departed. Indeed, as the ecclesiastes says, there is a time for everything under heaven.

To us mortals, talking about death is morbid. But, death is so natural and it happens all the time. When it happens in our family, we kind of pause and make it an occasion for reflecting on the mysteries of life and our mortality. We make an accounting of what is important in life. Are we just going through all the motions of surviving or really living? How do we want to be remembered when we die?

There is also a material aspect to dying and I wish to share some parts of that. Presiding over the practical side of funeral arrangements fell into my lap last week. One takes care of the hospital papers, embalmment to last the whole wake, the rituals and prayers during the wake, informing relatives and friends,

arranging the memorial park or cemetery, the church service and the burial ritual. Unlike, in the Muslim world, where the burial ritual is done within twenty four hours, the wake for Christians usually lasts for days. Some funeral parlors have services that take care of everything. Some funeral parlors also make arrangements for a pauper’s burial for the poor where the funeral expenses are subsidized by the state. Our Davao City government, for example, has an efficient way of subsidizing funeral expenses for those in need. For this, one gets the bill or statement of account from the funeral parlor and presents this to the city hall and the funds are paid to the funeral parlor. For all these, the crucial documents are the death certificate and the barangay certification. Although, we all die and that is the great equalizer, the practical funeral arrangements remind us always that even in death, there is a social stratification or division of people into social classes of the rich and the poor.

If the deceased has properties, inheritance passes to the heirs upon death. One needs the courts for probate ( a procedure where a will is proved valid or invalid) if there is a will or just an extrajudicial partition of properties as soon as the heirs agree to the project of partition and this needs to be published. It is a good idea for decedents to identify which piece of property is given to which child so that there are no surprises and to prevent siblings’ conflict upon death of donor or decedent. As death, taxes, too, are a certainty. Some donate their property to their children while still alive and for these one still needs to pay donors’ taxes. The privilege of giving is taxable. Many great women and men have immortalized themselves by their work, bequests, donations and accomplishments that have outlived them. We cannot bring our money to heaven and so let us celebrate life always by sharing ourselves to humanity in life and in death.